2Passion's Blog
Confessions of a Baby Boomer

I found you

I’ve quickly gotten back in the affair/infidelity world.  Seems my story and posts naturally track to those having similar experiences.

When I last blogged, we formed quiet a network of folks in various stages of disarray caused by affairs.  My biggest challenger (and best friend) was dealing with her own issues.  We all tried to help, console, advise.

I shut down my blog during the divorce and only recently started to get back into things.  I see a lot of the same things going on with the group I have connected to.  It is great to see your support for one another.  This stuff is hard. I hope it can show others that happiness is out there but you have to be willing to do what it takes to get it.  It may mean staying and trying to reconcile but it might mean splitting and finding someone.

Image result for moving on after divorce

I am an exception I guess.  After a long term marriage with counseling, then affairs with counseling, I could see that nothing was going to change and sought a divorce.  My ex did not want it.  I made a generous settlement proposal and she finally signed it on the day we were going to mediation.  Our anniversary as it turns out.

She left the small town where we had lived for so long and went back home to the big city.  It’s been over 6 years since I moved out 5 since the divorce.  She has not really moved on and I don’t think there is anything I can do to help her.

Image result for moving on after divorce

I think everyone wants happiness.  The ex said that was not important– staying married was, for staying married’s sake.  Till death do us part– the marriage was dead.

Why should a foolish marriage vow

John Dryden1631 – 1700

Why should a foolish marriage vow, 
  Which long ago was made,
Oblige us to each other now
  When passion is decay’d?
We loved, and we loved, as long as we could,
  Till our love was loved out in us both:
But our marriage is dead, when the pleasure is fled:
  ‘Twas pleasure first made it an oath.

If I have pleasures for a friend,
  And farther love in store,
What wrong has he whose joys did end,
  And who could give no more?
‘Tis a madness that he should be jealous of me,
Or that I should bar him of another:
For all we can gain is to give our selves pain,
When neither can hinder the other.

Don’t start!!  I know the vow is not foolish but you can’t just say you made a vow and not try to live up to the conditions.

After the divorce, I started dating an old friend after her husband died.  She is amazing, an energizer bunny.  Just keeps going and going. And so have  we. We have been lucky enough to travel and more importantly, make each other happy.

Image result for energizer bunny

It does not hurt that her sexual scale probably exceeds mine.  And that says a lot!  Oh the things we have tried!!!

This is my story now.

This is my song, “I found you.”

I’m glad I did.

 

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